Unpolished Ponderings

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Growing Pains

Confessions

I have a few confessions to make. I am unorganized. I can be a bit of a scatterbrain. And I don’t do well with details.

People don’t usually believe me when I tell them that. I’m a big picture person who gravitates towards brainstorming and creating more than planning and organizing. I tend to work in spurts and go where my ideas take me rather than follow a logical process. I struggle with managing my time, planning effectively, organizing my tasks and following directions. Instead of being a perfectionist, I tend to gloss over details and care more about the overall meaning and essence.

Why am I sharing this? Because unfortunately most of life is made up of details. Social media, emails, passwords, bills, insurance plans, meal planning, appointments, social obligations, the classroom and the workplace all run by a schedule. And if you can’t keep up, you miss out.

Because of my struggles with details and organization, I tend to shy away from and even fear any tasks that require these skills. To be fair, years of chronic illness, brain fog and other mental struggles add their fair share of obstacles in these areas. But I’ve used these weaknesses as an excuse to shy away from certain tasks and hold myself back from growing for too long.

Time for a Change

Last week I shared how I want to start selling my art and seeing where that goes. I received truly encouraging feedback from others that has inspired me to give this a fair shot. As much as the business part of this idea daunts me, I see how this is a chance for me to grow in areas of personal weakness. It might be difficult and take time, especially given the physical obstacles of my chronic illness, but I believe this is a great opportunity to build up life skills and learn to manage details rather than running away from them.

I’m Not Alone

Like I said, I’ve always loved brainstorming, creating, writing, developing big-picture ideas. What often holds me back is the inability to translate my ideas into logical action steps that make them possible. This is where I need others to show me how to make my ideas attainable.

Fortunately people have graciously offered to assist me in this art process however they can and I am eager to receive their help. I realize that I can’t do this alone and am excited to see what can be accomplished with the right help.

Can You Relate?

Do you ever find yourself purposefully holding back in certain areas because of personal weakness and lack of confidence? Do failed attempts in the past or discouraging words from others keep you paralyzed in insecurity? I believe we all experience this to some degree or another because we all have weaknesses.

While many say we can just pull ourselves together and figure it out, I don’t completely agree with that sentiment. I believe in many cases we truly need to humble ourselves and invite others in to grow. And there is nothing wrong with that. People are gifted in so many areas that it would be a shame to never reach out and learn from another who has great insight and capability in areas we don’t. Likely they will grow and learn from us also in the process.

I’m excited to see where this plan goes. But no matter what happens, I am ready to build more life skills and become more well-rounded in what I can accomplish and offer to others.